Today my house is very, very quiet.

Last week, I helped one daughter move into her dormitory in New York, said goodbye to my husband of twenty-one years as he moves to another hemisphere, and this morning, put my other daughter on a flight to Italy. I returned to a house occupied now only by my two Shelties and me—an “empty nest,” for sure.

I had decided long ago that the theme of “Quiet” should follow “Voice,” but I had no way of knowing how that theme would hit me so personally, precisely as the month begins. As I told my best friend Cristi, there is no denying that this is a difficult and painful season of my life—so much goodbying—but it is just that: a season. This time, too, shall pass, and I can’t begin to imagine what will follow; I am certain it will be filled with joy and pain, challenges and triumphs, highs and lows. In a word: life.

I know from my practice that the only way past the difficult times is through them. Sitting in meditation, a practice of quieting the mind and observing thoughts, I feel a wave of grief and I recognize it, call it by name. “Ah, this is what sadness feels like.” I pay attention to it, locate it in my body, describe it. But I don’t grasp it—I simply allow it to be, and give it the space it needs. I allow tears to flow freely. Grief merely wants to be seen and felt, and once I greet it and call it by name, it begins to ease its grip on me; I can let it go. Then along comes joy, and again, I say, “Ah, this is what ecstasy feels like.” I pay attention to it, locate it, feel it fully, and let it go.

This month, I want to explore the practice of meditation and how it can benefit everyone to train the mind to rest. Learning to calm the constant chatter and judgements of our own thoughts is an essential skill if one wants to experience true joy and true peace. I will have a conversation with a meditation instructor/practitioner to learn techniques that anyone can use daily.

I also intend to delve into the ways that we use noise as a distraction, from restaurants with music so loud that conversation is impossible to the common urge to tune into electronics to tune out our own thoughts. All the noise that surrounds us can have negative effects on our health, so I’ll be looking at ways to get relief from the cacophonous soundscape.

Then again, some of us can never get complete relief—from, as Dr. Seuss said in How the Grinch Stole Christmas, “Oh, the noise! Oh, the noise, noise, noise, noise!”—because the sound we hear is inside our heads. I’ll describe the impact that tinnitus and hearing loss have had on me, and the social and psychological impact of hearing difficulties as we age.

In addition, I will review Susan Cain’s book Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking to discern how quiet people contribute immeasurably to our society, as well as the children’s book Too Much Noise by Ann McGovern.

While last month was about the power of finding and using our voices, this month is about the strength found in stillness. I invite you, Dear Reader, to pay attention to the role of quiet and tranquility in your life. Become cozy with quietude. Set aside time in your day for a quiet practice. Then come back to this page and share your experience with the DoYouMind community.

Until next time,